Each one of us would like to be much more successful or happier and healthier. I have myself had this great thirst for a better life, both personally as well as professionally. During the last two decades of my corporate career, I have gone through various training programs, coaching, mentoring etc. and now I am a Certified Executive Coach myself. I have also experimented with many spiritual practices in the pursuit of self improvement and I follow an ancient spiritual practice as well.
Initially whenever I did something new to better myself, I was thoroughly enlightened and impressed with what I had learnt. However, soon enough, I found myself falling back into my old habits, behaving in the same manner as I had in the past...in fact it became worse because now I had identified/labeled the issues and therefore felt worse about not being able to correct myself, which in fact made me more unhappy than I originally was. So this made me ask this nagging question to myself.. where am I headed? What is the point of all the self development work if I am not able to practice the learnings in my day to day life?
I realized that when a person understands the so called do's and don'ts in life, he/she starts 'judging' and 'condemning' the 'don'ts' such as anger, bad attitude, insecurity, fear, lack of confidence, greed etc. in himself as well as others, rather than 'practicing' the 'do's' better.
As a Leadership and Life Coach I have met many people who usually wonder why they are not getting any path breaking results from the leadership, spiritual or other self-development work that they have been practicing.
For example do you think there is any pain area, which you are still not able to transform? Have you identified your inner areas of concern? You may like to do a quick check through the questions below...
Do you have frequent conflicts with authority figures? Will you do almost anything to avoid conflict? Are you often excessively critical of other people? Do you express anger or irritation in a way that you later regret? Do you mask your feelings to please your seniors at work? Do you need to be in control at all times & find it difficult to delegate? Do you carry unnecessary Anger/Worry/Fear/Guilt? Do you usually have Feeling of emptiness & dissatisfaction? Do you procrastinate a lot? Do you have trouble finishing things?
Sometimes, we seem successful, rich and happy to outsiders…but the inner reality may be a little different !
A few years ago I was being trained in a process of self transformation called Inner-Child work. Its then I realised that my struggle with the outer world was a reflection of an 'inner unrest'. I was amazed to discover that my current patterns of beliefs and behaviour were cast when I was a mere child. As I observed myself and others during this 6 day intense workshop, I understood how unaddressed emotions of childhood like fear, anger, anxiety, loss and abandonment turn into adult issues of insecurity, anxiety, career roadblocks, broken relationships, lack of prosperity, lack of self-worth, mistrust, irritation and frustration.
The more I explored this, the more I realized that this is universally true for almost every one in the world!
So once we are able to identify the root cause of behavior patterns and are able to heal them, we can operate from a joyful and creative space. We can then not only be more successful in our work (business/job/coaching), we can benefit much more from the self development work that we do!
Yes we can fully integrate with our inner-self and be the person we have always wanted to be! We can then realise our true-potential and live our best life!